Blottered

Canadian serial killer Karla Holmolka gives birth

noreply@blogger.com (Danielle) — Thu, 15 Feb 2007 04:16:00 +0000

Between 1990-1992, Karla Holmolka, together with her husband Paul Bernardo, raped and murdered at least four teenage girls, including her own sister. In return for testifying against her husband, Karla received a plea bargain, pleading guilty to manslaughter and receiving a 12 year prison sentence. She finished serving her time and was released on July 4, 2005. Paul is still in prison. In 2005, That 70's Show's Laura Prepon starred in a film about the couple's crimes.

Now it is being reported in the Canadian media that she, using the name Leanne Teale, gave birth to a seven pound boy at a Montreal hospital on February 3rd.

The lawyer for the families of her victims said, "There is a very distressing irony that their children won't grow up to have children, and the person who willingly participated in their abduction, kidnapping and sex torture and murder is now having a child."

Source: The Globe and Mail, City News

Not Starring Justin Timberlake, Borat, Michael J. Fox or Jessica Alba

noreply@blogger.com (krucoff) — Tue, 31 Oct 2006 03:43:00 +0000

Monday Night Shoot All

Nolle Prosequi

noreply@blogger.com (krucoff) — Tue, 31 Oct 2006 03:27:00 +0000

Expect some changes around here soon. There's a new sheriff in town, and his name is Reggie Hammond. You all be cool, right on.

Guns Don't Kill People. People Kill People.

noreply@blogger.com (Malatron) — Wed, 19 Jul 2006 19:37:00 +0000

"A body found in north-east London has been identified as that of a banker who was questioned by the FBI about the Enron fraud case. Police said they were treating the death in Chingford of Neil Coulbeck, who worked for the Royal Bank of Scotland until 2004, as "unexplained"."
[BBC]

"Coulbeck joins convicted Enron kingpin Ken Lay and U.S. Export-Import Bank chief (and Cheney crony) Phlip Merrill on the roster of convenient deaths related to the U.S.-Enron collapse. Lay's involvement with Enron's crimes is well known. Less documented is the deep criminal involvement of the U.S. Export-Import bank -- a little-understood federal agency that shovels billions to "foreign" companies and governments to encourage exports of American goods and services. In reality, the Ex-Im bank mostly hands taxpayer money to American corporations with foreign operations such as Enron, which took some $800 million from Ex-Im between the two Bush presidencies.
[Sploid]

"A coroner in Texas has ruled that Clifford Baxter, a former senior executive of the bankrupt US energy giant Enron, committed suicide."
[BBC]

"According to a police source, Skilling was running up to people in bars and on the street, pulling open their clothes, and claiming that they were undercover FBI agents. The source said police took Skilling to a hospital for observation and he was not charged with a crime. Skilling is facing 35 federal counts including fraud, insider trading and other crimes in the collapse of Enron."
[Capital News 9]

This post brought to you by And You Will Know Us By The Trail of Dead.

Whip City

noreply@blogger.com (Malatron) — Sat, 01 Jul 2006 23:39:00 +0000

Nothing really starts your day off right as does a big picture of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie on the front page of your local paper. And to find that Whip City itself is the center of attention, well...lemme tell you.

According to TMZ, "...the FBI and Massachusetts authorities raided a Westfield, Mass. home Tuesday night and seized photos of a baby shower held by Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt."

But according to the local paper here, "The FBI somehow got left out of all the fun. Michael G. O'Reilly, supervisor of the FBI's Western Massachusetts office, said yesterday his agency had not been involved, as did Enfield Police Chief Carl J. Sferrazza."

No matter. For those of you not familiar with this very important case, it goes like this. Jolie's brother took the offending photos. His camera was broken so he brought it back to Best Buy so that they could fix it. Best Buy sent the camera, with the memory stick still in place, to Precision Camera and Video repair in Enfield Conn. Why you might ask did the Best Buy in LA send the camera, literally, all the way across the country? Well, actually, your guess is as good as mine, though the store does claim online to be the largest camera repair facility in North America, and they do repair warranty repair for all the major camera manufactures.

Again according to TMZ, "...two employees at Precision, Bill Keyes and Adam Beckwith, discovered the pictures in the digital camera. We're told that Keyes told authorities that Beckwith downloaded the photos."

Keyes than floated a balloon out to Celebrity Baby Blog and others, attempting to ascertain the value of his sweet find.

But somebody dropped on a dime on him, and that's when the authorities in LA contacted the authorities out here, and a search warrant was served on Keyes home. The photos now sit safely in the Wesfield Police Department, awaiting a safe return to their rightful owners. I imagine they will be escorted back to Jolie on Air Force one itself.

[TMZ: Police Raids Over Jolie-Pitt Baby Shower]

Who Killed The Electric Car?

noreply@blogger.com (Malatron) — Sun, 25 Jun 2006 03:26:00 +0000

Opening in NY and LA on June 28th.

Because even though it's just a car, that doesn't make it any less of a crime.

Tickets:

In LA:

Link to the NOW segment with the Director of Who Killed The Electric Car

[You Tube, in three parts]

[Sony Pictures Classics/Who Killed The Electric Car.]

How Many Policemen Does It Take...

noreply@blogger.com (Sizemore) — Sat, 24 Jun 2006 14:49:00 +0000

to retrieve a football?

Ray Markham found out when he decided to make a stand against rogue footballs and refused to return one after it smashed a window:

The 68-year-old, who lives next to a policeman in Cubbington, said he was then arrested by four Warwickshire Police officers for theft of the ball... Mr Markham said: "If it hadn't been a policeman next door let's be honest, I wouldn't have had four policeman on my doorstep, I wouldn't have seen a policeman. They can't come out to burglaries, do you think they would've come out, four policeman to collect a ball?"

With the current World Cup fever gripping the UK and our brave boys doing their bit overseas it's surprising that Markham didn't find himself crucified in his front garden as a warning for others to be more reverent of out national sport. Or is that cricket? I forget.

BBC: Man arrested over ball in garden

How Do You Put A Corporation In Jail?

noreply@blogger.com (Malatron) — Fri, 23 Jun 2006 19:50:00 +0000

You don't. You can't. It's only a piece of paper that exists, most likely, in some back room of a drab looking state building in Delaware. A small white piece of paper, with more rights than a person, yet without the unfortunate application of responsibilty and accountability that we ourselves have to be saddled with.

I want to be a corporation.

"Drugmaker Merck & Co.'s research facility in West Point dumped a chemical compound that included cyanide into the sewer system, killing more than 1,000 fish in Wissahickon Creek, federal authorities said Thursday."

"It's hard to believe that a huge company like Merck would take this long to get to the bottom of such a serious problem," said Tracy Carluccio of the Delaware Riverkeeper Network, a nonprofit environmental group.

Um, actually, no. It's not.

And than, as if on cue from the devil himself, "A week after a contaminant was released into the Wissahickon Creek, killing more than 1,000 fish, malfunctions at the Ambler sewage treatment plant Monday night sent 55,000 gallons of raw sewage into the waterway."

Philadelphia Inquirer

Merck & Company Inc.
West Point Facility
P.O. Box 4
770 Sumneytown Pike
WP20-208
West Point, PA 19486
Montgomery County

Contact:
Steven C. Wittmer
Director, Site Environmental Management
Merck & Co. Inc. - West Point
215-652-6427
215-652-3931 (fax)
steven_wittmer@merck.com

Arson. It's What All The Kids Are Doing

noreply@blogger.com (Malatron) — Wed, 21 Jun 2006 23:07:00 +0000

Awoke to the sun shining thru my blindless windows at 5am-ish. Heard the familiar sounds of heavy trucks backing up and moving around sluggishly. I made a mental note about this, as I used to hear this every morning when the garbage trucks would come slumbering down the street. I no longer hear these sounds though, as garbage trucks are no longer allowed to do pick-ups before 7am due to the unfortunate noise they produce.

Then I smelt the smoke. That unmistakable smoke smell.

Looked out the window, and this is what I saw.

Put on my pants, grabbed the camera, woke the roommate, and went outside.

And I took photos.

I took photos of a house burning down to the ground, a target of a succesful arson attempt. Only a few short weeks after a similar attempt in March.

At approx. 2 am this morning, someone walked up to the back porch, poured gasoline all over it, and set it ablaze. Six people lived in that house, and all six made it out safely.

Video of the firefighting effort, and of the subsequent demolition, here.

Spread 'em asshole! I'm taking you in. I hope you brought your toothbrush!*

noreply@blogger.com (Malatron) — Mon, 19 Jun 2006 21:11:00 +0000

Italian prosecutors have called for a US soldier to stand trial for the killing of an Italian intelligence officer in Baghdad in 2005.

Three US soldiers have been charged over the deaths of three male Iraqi prisoners, the US military has said.

Police in Northern Ireland today arrested 10 people in a major anti-terrorist operation targeting alleged dissident republicans.

A couple have gone on trial in Spain accused of a murder which marked a turning point in popular attitudes to the Basque separatist group Eta.

Egyptian police have arrested 31 members of the banned opposition group, the Muslim Brotherhood, in the Mediterranean city of Marsa Matruh.

Bollywood star Salman Khan has been charged in a poaching case by a court in the Indian state of Rajasthan.

The mayor of Jersey City was arrested Saturday morning on charges of disorderly conduct and resisting arrest in a clash with the police outside a bar on the Jersey Shore, the authorities said.

*What I once heard an officer say to someone he was arresting. We laughed about it for days, and surmised that some police must have a mental list of cool things they are gonna say to people they arrest. Because you know that this cop was just waiting to use that one.

Bang Bang.

CSI: Underwater

noreply@blogger.com (Malatron) — Sat, 17 Jun 2006 19:39:00 +0000

June 13, 2006 - By Jeff Barnard, Associated Press

ASHLAND, Ore. - When death strikes a coral reef, whether from an oil spill off Mexico or sediment unleashed by a dam bursting in Hawaii, marine biologists know what to look for, but not how to document and preserve their findings so they will hold up in court.

Now biologists and criminalists from around the world are joining forces to develop crime-scene investigation techniques that work under water.

The "CSI"-type standards will govern such things as how to take notes under the sea, how to mark off the crime scene, how to photograph it, and how to preserve the "chain of custody" so that defense attorneys cannot argue that evidence was tampered with.

Full Story

One of these days, hopefully while I am still alive, whales and other marine life will evolve into humans, and punish us for our transgressions against their habitats.

If that does happen, I'll save them the hassle and just shoot myself.

Like a Samurai.

If The Glove Doesn't Fit, You Must Acquit..

noreply@blogger.com (Malatron) — Wed, 14 Jun 2006 15:48:00 +0000

...True dat Johnny, true dat.

But what if the glove does fit, you were walking a mile in his shoes, both hands were in the cookie jar, and the pot was calling the kettle black?

Talk about things that make you go hmmm....

Drugs in officer's car lead to internal probe
Wednesday, June 14, 2006
By PETER GOONAN
pgoonan@repub.com

SPRINGFIELD, MA - Law enforcement officials chose not to pursue any criminal action against a city police officer after discovering brass knuckles and a small amount of drugs in his private car in October, according to records obtained by The Republican in a first-ever public look at an internal police investigation.

The officer, James F. Kervick III, said he found some of the items while on duty and the others he couldn't explain, according to the report...

...While conducting an inventory, police discovered a vial of marijuana and a pair of brass knuckles in the car's center console as well as an unlocked briefcase containing two packets of marijuana and half a tablet of methamphetamine...

...Kervick did acknowledge ownership of other items in the briefcase, including leather gloves with weighted knuckles and a pocket scale, according to the report. Police also found police equipment in Kervick's [personal]car, including rounds of ammunition, police jackets, handcuffs, batons and a gas mask...

...Neither the Wilbraham police nor the Hampden County District Attorney's office was interested in pursuing a criminal complaint because it could not be proved that Kervick ever possessed the contraband found in his car or had criminal intent, according to statements filed by Wilbraham police...

"The investigation did not conclude who criminally controlled the substance prior to its surrender to us by a third party," Wilbraham Police Chief Allen M. Stratton said yesterday. "At this point, our investigation is closed and no charges have been filed."

It's really appropriate that no charges were filed in this case. As the DA and Wilbraham police stated, "it could not be proved that Kervick ever possessed the contraband found in his car or had criminal intent, according to statements filed by Wilbraham police..."The investigation did not conclude who criminally controlled the substance prior to its surrender to us by a third party," Wilbraham Police Chief Allen M. Stratton said yesterday. "At this point, our investigation is closed and no charges have been filed." [Springfield Republican]

hmm....

HOLYOKE - Police arrested a 25-year-old city man yesterday and charged him with cocaine trafficking after finding more than 200 grams of cocaine in his car.

EASTHAMPTON - Five people were arrested on drug charges Saturday...With the help of Holyoke police, officers pulled over a car on East Street and discovered 12 grams of cocaine in it, as well as drug dealing materials, police said. Four people in the car were arrested: Christine A. Slabinski, 44, of 67 Emerald Place, Easthampton; Michael Roper, 18, of 524 Richmond Hill Road, Augusta, Ga.; Benjamin Smith, 63 Emerald Place, Easthampton, and a 16-year-old boy.

"...Neither the Wilbraham police nor the Hampden County District Attorney's office was interested in pursuing a criminal complaint because it could not be proved that Kervick ever possessed the contraband found in his car or had criminal intent, according to statements filed by Wilbraham police..."

I Hate You So Much. I Hope You Die.

noreply@blogger.com (Malatron) — Tue, 13 Jun 2006 17:13:00 +0000

Homeless Man Goes on Trial in Hate-Crime Murder.
"WHITE PLAINS, June 12 — The petite blond woman was found lying in a pool of blood in broad daylight near a popular mall. A homeless black man with a history of violent rapes was quickly arrested a block away, shirtless and soaked in blood. He later told the police that he had hidden in a stairwell with a knife for hours that day, waiting to kill a white person."
[nytimes. June 13, 2006]

Fourth Man Is Arrested After Attack on a Dance Recording Artist in the East Village.
"A fourth man was arrested yesterday in connection with the beating of a Manhattan singer who the police said was attacked by a gang of young men who kicked him, screamed anti-gay slurs at him and broke his jaw as the singer walked through the East Village early Saturday." [nytimes. June 12, 2006]

Batsman Convicted of Howard Beach Hate Crimes.
"A white man who uttered a racial epithet while using a baseball bat to attack a black man in Queens last summer was found guilty of hate crimes yesterday in a case that carried echoes of an infamous racial beating in the same neighborhood two decades earlier." [nytimes. June 10, 2006]

Brooklyn: Teenagers Charged in Hate Crime.
"Four teenagers were charged with assaulting and robbing a 16-year-old boy yesterday in what the police said was a hate crime. Around 3 p.m., at East 15th Street and Avenue T in Brooklyn, the four teenagers, who are black, began punching the victim, who is white, in his face while using racial slurs, the police said." [nytimes. June 7, 2006]

noreply@blogger.com (Malatron) — Tue, 13 Jun 2006 00:48:00 +0000

"RIO DE JANEIRO, Brazil - Police arrested 28 people suspected of operating an illegal logging ring in Brazil's Amazon rain forest and were looking for 46 more, officials said..."

"The rain forest lost 7,300 square miles, an area more than half the size of Belgium - between July 2004 and August 2005, down from 10,500 square miles the year before, according to the environment ministry...Brazil's rain forest is the size of Western Europe and covers 60 percent of the country's territory. Experts say as much as 20 percent of its 1.6 million square miles has already been destroyed by development, logging and farming..."

Honey, BTW, when you're at Wal-Mart picking up my new Fendi, would you do see if they have any more of that tropical flooring we used in the kitchen? I would just love to do the great room over in the same style.

Thanks, kisses.

and p.s.
on the way home, stop at McDonald's and grab me some burgers. I'm starving.

Love you.

I'm going to Wal-Mart. Do you want me to pick you up anything?

noreply@blogger.com (Malatron) — Sun, 11 Jun 2006 20:12:00 +0000

Yes honey, will you get me the new shoulder bag from Fendi? Thanks.

"Luxury goods firm LVMH has sued Wal-Mart, claiming the world's largest retailer is selling illegal copies of its Fendi-brand products in some shops. LVMH complained that the Fendi goods were being sold as "genuine" at prices that were discounted as much as 70%."

In the battle over good vs. bad...

noreply@blogger.com (Malatron) — Sun, 11 Jun 2006 01:29:00 +0000

...as measured by Google Trends, it seems that good is leading a charge for moral superiority. Good had a noticeable spike in the new year of 2003. That makes sense to me, as the Department of Homeland Security had officially begun operations in the month of January of 2003, hence more good.

Let the music play...

Don't Rove the Boat

noreply@blogger.com (krucoff) — Mon, 15 May 2006 01:49:00 +0000

Karl Rove will soon be indicted in the CIA leak case. He has answered Frank Rich's call of "Will the Real Traitors Please Stand Up?" Now he will most likely wish Al Gore a happy mother's day in song and distribute it on AllOfMP3.

Official Blottered Suggested Sentencing: 2,000 hours of community service collecting beer bottle caps on an Indian reservation.

How A. Meiwses-ing of Him

noreply@blogger.com (kiddigit) — Wed, 10 May 2006 12:29:00 +0000

German Armin Meiwes ate a willing participant Bernd Jurgen Brandes and got a life sentence for it.

"Judges at the first trial said they based their verdict of manslaughter on defence evidence which suggested Meiwes' victim had volunteered to be eaten and killed. Meiwes maintained that he would "never have touched" his victim had he not wanted to be killed." The Independent

This reminds me of a joke my brother claimed he made up:
Two cannibals are eating a dude. Cannibal A says to Cannibal B, "How is it?"
Cannibal B says, "I'm having a ball."

My brother was about 10 when he first told me this.

Memphis Crime Waves: Not Bye-Bye

noreply@blogger.com (krucoff) — Wed, 10 May 2006 03:27:00 +0000

"Crime is seamless, that's the main message. We have to realize, just because we have one side of street here and one there, that there is gonna be a difference in law enforcement, there really isn't." says Steve Shular, with the Shelby County Sheriff's Department. [WREG-TV]

I'm not sure what he means, but someone better cover me when I head to the counter for another Big Mac.

Show-and-Tell City

noreply@blogger.com (krucoff) — Wed, 10 May 2006 03:06:00 +0000

FBI Special Agent Tom VanWormer hopes the discovery of a boy in a motel room with an alleged Internet child-sex predator serves as “another slap-in-the-face wake-up call that this happens in Tell City." [Perry County News]

Coincidence, I'm sure, but Michael Jackson is from Gary, Indiana. That's a long drive to Tell City.

Driving Directions from Gary, Indiana to Tell City, Indiana [Yahoo]

Knock knock. Who's there? Snore.

noreply@blogger.com (kiddigit) — Tue, 09 May 2006 20:59:00 +0000

Ever wondered what an FBI memo looked like? Here's a recently declassified FBI memo concerning a March 8, 1971, episode of Rowan and Martin’s Laugh-In. My colon clenches in fear. Apparently, they did not have that reaction; theirs was more like logic your mom might make: "Calling people names only makes you look bad, little Timmy."

The FBI's summation on Laugh In:

"All in all, this skit pertaining to the FBI was rather typical of the poor fare that is served on this so-called laugh show, a show that has gained some considerable notoriety by its risqué jokes and irreverent satirical attacks. Tasteless, sometimes downright vicious jokes and a great deal of forced humor add up to a more telling commentary on this low-grade show itself than on the FBI." Harpers Mag

p.s. Remember when Goldie Hawn was a dish?

"Spree": Not Well

noreply@blogger.com (kiddigit) — Tue, 09 May 2006 20:35:00 +0000

Much like how the word "star" is being abused by the likes of Kevin (The Original Babby-daddy) Federline, Paris (Triple Threat and Hole) Hilton, Lindsay (Beep, beep) Lohan, Britney Spears, Olivia Newton-John, Michelle Kwon, the iPod, Simon Cowell, Steve Jobs, Mesothelioma, Tom Cruise, any porn actress, and large former talk-show hosts married to presumably gay men (Ms. Jones, I'm looking at you, not all at once obviously), the word "spree" seems to be falling in valuation.

"A trio of Winnipeggers have been arrested for their alleged role in a weekend crime spree that involved breaking into a hotel room, stealing a purse from a party, and trying to cash a forged cheque." Cnews.com

Bonnie and Clyde are weeping at the patheticness they hath wrought.

Fishscalin'

noreply@blogger.com (sb) — Wed, 05 Apr 2006 15:45:00 +0000

Miscellaneous Crime reports.
Louisville, Kentucky

500 block of E. Broadway. A man said two people came up to him about 7 p.m.
March 18. One person asked, "Do you remember me?" then cut him across the face.
As the two walked away, the other person threatened, "Next time we'll kill you."

At least you got remembered, motherfucker. My own moms acts like she don't know me.

1900 block of Peabody Lane. A 24-year-old woman said she and a man got into a fight in front of his door about 7 a.m. March 23 and he pushed her head through a window.

He was a real "catch". Key sonorous Casio Keyboard cymbals.

Muhammad Ali Boulevard at the ramp to Interstate 65. An officer was flagged down by people reporting a fight involving several males about 6:30 p.m. March 29. The officer began to chase a person on foot and the person turned and fired two shots at the officer. Others were yelling, "Shoot the officer."

At least we've evolved beyond calling the police epithets like pig. "Shoot the officer" means No Child Left Behind is working.

Silk Liquors, 2100 W. Muhammad Ali Blvd. A woman said she was walking to a bus stop about 6 a.m. March 22 when a person grabbed her and tried to pull her between the buildings. The robber took $35, along with her change purse, identification and debit card.

I'm guessin' if you live here, don't hang out on Muhammad Ali Blvd. Silk Liquors? What's that shit all about?

1200 block of Cherry Blossom Drive. A person reported being robbed about 6:30 a.m. March 22. The items included a: Toyota Corolla, purse, cell phone, cash, credit and debit cards, identification, checkbook.
Makes it seem like the robber walked off with the Toyota Corrolla in his back pocket next to his cheap rubber clown nose.

Crime Reports (Courier-Journal)

The Shareef Don't Like It

noreply@blogger.com (sb) — Wed, 05 Apr 2006 15:12:00 +0000

I'm a big Clash fan. Those are some fun guys and they did fun things with their instruments. Though I'm more partial to the blood spattering Birthday Party and Pop Group art deco death punk - in the realm of political punk the Clash are the best.

London Calling is the crown of their career: Apparently it's also an anathema to the Crown's best blue bobbies and English cabbies.

A Englishman was pulled from a plane last week after a
cabbie reported him to authorities for singing along to the Clash.
Harraj
Mann, 24, hopped in a cab heading for the Durham Tees Valley Airport Wednesday
to catch a flight to London. As luck would have, his cab was outfitted with an
adapter that allowed him to plug in his MP3 player.
Together Mann and the
driver enjoyed Procol Harum's "A Whiter Shade Of Pale." But
soon things turned sour. Suddenly the driver was sitting in horrified silence as
Mann played Led Zeppelin's "Immigrant
Song."
When Mann sang along with punk legends The Clash's "London
Calling," with its warnings "Now war is declared -- and battle come down"
and "meltdown expected," the scared cabbie could do nothing but wait.
"He
didn't like Led Zeppelin or The Clash but I don't think there was any need to
tell the police," Mann told the Daily Mirror.
After the idiot dropped off
Mann, he called the authorities. The police did their part by pulling Mann from
his flight and taking him in for questioning.

Fine, first I want to know why we cannot arrest people who listen to Queensryche. Second I want to arrest anyone who purchases Chinese Democracy if it ever sees the light of day.

The Clash Gets Man Pulled From Plane (Courtesy our delightful sisters of the Revolution at Sploid)

Severed Penis Is The New Career Builder

noreply@blogger.com (sb) — Fri, 17 Mar 2006 14:19:00 +0000

Been a busy year already. 2006 is the year the world dies. So far this year I've spent every available moment in constructing fictions about the death of Satan, the Iraq war, and my birthday on March 19! (I will accept major credit cards).

"Happy birthday SB, you look nice and you're gettin' fat."

"Yeah - thanks." (I hope you enjoy your next teeth cleaning).

Check out this future porn star:

Fik, 33, cut off his own penis during a Northwest Side rampage Wednesday
morning. When confronted by police, Fik hurled several knives and his severed
organ at the officers, police said. Officers stunned him with a Taser and took
him into custody.
(...)Doctors at Northwestern Memorial Hospital reattached
Fik's penis Wednesday, sources said. He was listed in good condition Thursday,
according to hospital spokesman Andrew Buchanan, who declined to comment
further.

If "Buttafuco" can do it, why not "Fik"?

Man severs own penis, throws it at officers (Chicago Sun Times)